Not so much anymore, but every once in a while I get a request to work with a client dealing with addiction. And while I’m a firm believer that everyone should get treatment regardless of their financial means, if they have the resources, they should have skin in the game.
For years I worked with a very high level company that dealt with people who came from a privileged place. Extremely well off, they would try to negotiate the fee for the service. After several attempts, her insurance would no longer pay for addiction services, or they would pay for a 10-day inpatient facility. Just long enough to medically stabilize them, but zero time to really begin the recovery process. For that reason, we would be contacted for a high level hands-on service. From professional athletes, CEOs to celebrities, many just didn’t want to go out of pocket. What I found interesting is that those who were willing often enjoyed better results. That having skin in the game put a value on his effort.
This really became apparent when I was working with young adults and the family was covering the bill. In many of these cases, there was little respect for the process. However, when I entered the prison system and worked as a chaplain, I routinely encountered men and women being discharged who were willing to do anything to get help. I would connect them to a home meeting or group and they would make coffee, set up chairs, work on the hotline, or drive someone back and forth. That was the only coin they had. They gladly paid and I would gladly help them. Those who didn’t bargain for their lives and had skin in the game almost always fared better in their recovery.
I was once working with a business owner with multiple relapses. They were doing very well {7 figures a year well.} They could easily have paid for any treatment facility in the world. They opted for minimal services, and a decade later they are still actively addicted. The conversation every time we re-engaged was about money. It’s not really about money at all. But I respect the process and commitment.
I have had clients who have had a drinking problem with a $20.00 a day bar bill. When the question of money came up, they quickly realized that by not drinking, they suddenly had 600.00 a month to apply towards treatment. The person who did not hesitate often stood out. Likewise, the same for the person who held each meeting without a court order.
Money should not be an excuse when going for treatment. Why trade with your life? Those who have skin in the game {monetarily or not} almost always achieve better results. You have to give something to receive something. I have heard many of my clients say “If it didn’t hurt, I didn’t respect it.” When it comes to treatment. I hope it hurts. Damage your pockets or hurt your pride. It just has to hurt. We have to fight on the worst days to reach our best level. And it’s almost impossible to do that if you don’t have skin in the game and you don’t respect the process.