Your boyfriend ended the relationship before you were ready. You want it back so much. Life is not the same without him. Well, try the following tips. They may be the help you are looking for. He considers the relationship over, so he doesn’t chase after him. That means he doesn’t “just” go to the place he knows he frequents. For some people, showing up where they are is considered harassment and makes them terribly uncomfortable.
Do not communicate with him at all. That means no phone calls, no texts, no emails, no snail mail, not even messages sent through mutual friends. Close yourself to him. As far as you are concerned, he no longer exists.
Now, as long as you don’t have a boyfriend to waste your time, it’s time to work on yourself. Look back on the relationship, no matter how painful it may be for you. Take an honest look and see why the relationship failed and what you did that led to its failure. You need to know what happened so you can correct your behavior.
At this point in your life, you need a complete “makeover.” Start your own personal improvement project. You may want to do something about your physical appearance, like change your hairstyle or buy new clothes. Maybe now is the time to improve your intellect by taking some classes, reading different books, attending different events.
There are many organizations that could use your talents. Volunteer at your local soup kitchen or Y and help young children with their homework. You may find it fun to join the gym and work out several days a week. Get to work building a new you.
While you’re undergoing that makeover, work on developing your good points. For example, if you like to cook, take some cooking classes. If you like to paint, some art classes would be good.
Naturally, you should also work on those issues that you find unpleasant. If he never finishes a project and leaves it lying around the house, he learns to put things away when the day is done. If you’re that person who puts the dishes off until tomorrow, start insisting that the dishes be done before you retire for the night.
If being busy helping others is keeping you from letting go of your boyfriend, you may need to put your thoughts and feelings into words on paper. Putting your emotions on paper is very therapeutic. Whether you write your feelings in a letter or put them into a story, you’ll feel better when you’re done.
Once the story is on paper, don’t send it to your ex boyfriend. Don’t share it with anyone. It has served its purpose and must be destroyed. You don’t want to leave it lying around to embarrass yourself at a later date.
As time passes, you will think about the relationship. You’re human and we do that kind of thing. The further away you get from the breakup, the easier it becomes to choose to remember the good and ignore the ugly.
You have been working on developing your good points. You have been through a real change from your physical appearance to giving your time and talents to the less fortunate. It’s time to get social.
When you’re out with your friends, if you run into your ex boyfriend, be polite and friendly, but don’t give him the idea that you’re desperate for his attention. Sticky despair will make your ex boyfriend distance himself from you even more.
Over time, you will realize the new you. He may even realize that the new you is someone he would like to get to know again. As long as you call for an appointment, check your calendar and see where you can be reached.