You need multiple types of bonds with a boyfriend to ensure long-term love. If you have an unbreakable physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual connection of love, you will be able to handle the inevitable tests of adversity and the adjustments to change that will come your way over time.
The following key points are designed to help you get a more accurate reading on the current condition of your love relationship:
HOW EXTENSIVE IS ITS SENSORY APPEAL?
A strong connection here is when both parties respond favorably to each other for the way they look, sound, feel, taste, and smell. Examples of this might include when a man: (1) especially enjoys a woman’s natural scent, (2) likes the colors she wears, (3) likes to touch her skin and hair, (4) looks at her a lot from the distance, (5) plays the woman’s recorded messages just to hear the sound of her voice, and (6) delights in a simple kiss on the cheek, just to name a few. If neither of you feel a strong sensory connection, then romance will only come from forced and conscious efforts. That type of relationship will invariably fade over time or prove to be emotionally unsatisfying.
MEASURES BOTH PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL INTENSITY
In addition to his physical attraction to a woman, a man will also gauge his interest in her by the emotional intensity it arouses. The strength with which he sits can go up and down at various times. For some men, the emotional ups and downs are much more important than the downs. Like an addictive drug, some men may be attracted to a woman who rocks her world despite the negative side effects of that relationship.
ARE YOU THE MENTAL EQUIVALENT?
Aside from the physical and emotional aspects of attraction, there must also be a strong mental connection. When people have the same opinion and can think the same way on a variety of key issues, then there is enough mental relationship to expand as time goes on. Without a strong mental compatibility, your relationship is doomed to be a part-time activity. Eventually, each person will naturally go off to do their own thing and spend time with people who are more like-minded.
IS SILENCE GOLDEN?
One characteristic of a strong spiritual connection is the ability to “just be together” by sharing quiet moments. It is during these experiences that you appreciate the beauty of the moment with an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the presence of someone you care about. Choosing to sit quietly together by a fireplace to enjoy the beauty and warmth of watching wood burning together is a good indication of strong love. On the other hand, an excessive need to watch TV and tune out each other is not a good sign.
OBSERVE THE CONVERSATIONAL FLOW
How do you recognize an ideal flow in communication? It’s when conversations have a natural rhythm and each participant happily engages in both the role of speaker and listener. Too many short conversations, deathly silence from the other side, or excessive use of emails and text messages can hide a deeper flaw in the love connection.
APPRECIATE NATURAL LAUGHTER
When two people are in sync, there is a natural tendency to find more humor and laughter in everyday things. It’s not about being a comedian or falling in love with a guy with a salesman’s ability to make you laugh. It is more about the closeness you feel with a certain man. The feelings they share for each other make them both joyfully express themselves with humor, laughter, and fun. The absence of joy is a sure indicator of a poor connection in the relationship.
WHAT GOOD DOES THEY BRING OUT THE BEST IN THE OTHER?
When two people seem to be made for each other, there is a natural tendency for them to bring out the strengths of their partners. Any time a woman chooses to associate closely with a love interest, she should ask herself the following questions: (1) What has it made me think and believe? (2) What does she have me doing? and (3) What has she turned me into? If you absolutely know that the influence you have on each other is not good, then you are not in a healthy relationship.
DOES TIME WARPING OCCUR FREQUENTLY?
When two people are completely connected, there are times when time seems to pass quickly. These can be wonderful experiences where nothing seems to matter except the enjoyment of each other’s company. As the old adage wisely points out, time really does fly when you’re having fun. Or another way of looking at this indicator is that “time flies when you’re in love.”
DID YOU SAY THE MAGIC WORDS?
When a man is completely convinced of his love for a woman, it is natural for him to say, “I love you.” Being fully connected with her opens her heart and allows her to fully express her feelings for the woman. The absence of these magic words indicates that the man is consumed by fear of the consequences of saying it or by self-doubt that he has due to his lack of deep feelings or less than acceptable levels of romantic chemistry.
As you get better at measuring the quality of your love connections, you’ll save yourself time, effort, and emotion by avoiding dead-end romances. Also, it will focus on the ones that are most likely to work.
THE BOTTOM LINE
Dating someone sucks when you have no idea where you stand in the relationship. But dating is great when things are firing on all cylinders and your love for each other gets better with each passing day, week, month, and year.